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Discover the power of a loving vaginal massage

Yoni massage, also known as tantric vaginal massage, is an intimate, respectful, and healing form of touch. Not yet widely known in the Netherlands, but gaining popularity among women seeking deeper connection with their sexuality, self-love, or the bond with their partner.

The word yoni comes from Sanskrit and means 'sacred temple'. Within Hinduism, the yoni symbolises the source of feminine creativity, life energy, and sensuality. A yoni massage is therefore not an ordinary massage - it is a loving ritual that fosters connection, relaxation, and healing.

In this article, you will find a clear step-by-step plan with illustrations, gentle vaginal massage techniques, and a selection of the finest products for a safe, relaxed, and profound experience.

What is a yoni massage?

A yoni massage is a gentle and loving way to touch the vagina (yoni), the most intimate part of the female body, without goal or hurry. Not to induce an orgasm, but to release tension, let sexual energy flow, and experience deep relaxation.

A yoni massage can be liberating, healing, and transformative. It offers space to receive and feel, without having to give anything in return. To connect in gentleness and trust with your body, desire, and feminine power.

During this intimate massage for women, unprocessed emotions and past experiences stored in the pelvic area may surface. The clitoris and vagina are rich in nerve endings and energy points, more sensitive than any other part of the body.

The power and symbolism of the Yoni

The vagina is the most sensitive organ of the human body, even more sensitive than the penis. This is especially true for the clitoris, which is much larger than the visible tip. The clitoris extends as a butterfly-like structure beneath the skin along both labia inward and encompasses both the urethra and the vaginal wall.

By lovingly and attentively massaging this area, blockages, tensions, and stored energy can be released. Many women experience this as a deep inner liberation - physical, emotional, and energetic.

For women with traumas or unprocessed experiences, a yoni massage can also be
profoundly healing. The idea behind this is that the body, and especially the pelvis, 'remembers' what it has been through. Through safe, conscious, and respectful touch, space is created to let go of what was stuck.

There is also a similar massage for men, the lingam massage, but the sensitivity of the yoni is much greater than that of the lingam, so the experience is much more intense for her.

Who is a yoni massage suitable for?

Every adult woman can benefit from a yoni massage. Age, sexual preference, or experience play no role. The most important thing is that you can surrender to the moment. This requires a safe, loving atmosphere of trust.

The giver (masseur or masseuse) must fully attune to the receiving woman, without their own expectations or desires. This experience is entirely about her.

Be prepared: a yoni massage can release emotions that have long been beneath the surface. This can be intense - but also healing and liberating.

Do it yourself or have it done?

You can learn to give a yoni massage yourself (using the step-by-step plan below, for example), or you can have it done by an experienced professional. These are mostly women, but there are also good male masseurs. A massage by a male professional masseur is only advisable for women who already have considerable experience with tantra massage and yoni massage in particular, and only with a reputable and trustworthy masseur.

Make sure you research the masseur or masseuse thoroughly, as there is no official diploma or accreditation for the profession. Check whether they are open and honest about their practices and ask whether they are affiliated with a recognised professional organisation such as NIBIG and/or CAT.

Professionals who offer sex under the guise of tantra or yoni massage are not serious practitioners, but sex workers.

Getting started yourself?

You can perfectly well learn to give a yoni massage yourself. Anyone can learn it - with the right attention, respect, and a bit of practice, it becomes a loving and connecting experience.

Use the step-by-step plan further on in this article as a guide, or let yourself be guided by a good instruction book or DVD. Our favourite materials are from tantra expert Dirk Liesenfeld. They contain clear explanations and safe techniques, so you can begin with confidence.

Avoid superficial YouTube videos - these often lack the care that is so important for this massage. Given the puritanical tendency of American internet companies, it is generally difficult to find good and accessible video instruction.

DVDs we recommend:

Prefer a book?

Our favourites

Step-by-step plan for giving or receiving a yoni massage

1. Preparation

A yoni massage begins with good preparation. The aim is to create a cocoon of comfort and trust. The massage space should be comfortable, have a pleasant temperature, be atmospherically lit, and smell pleasant, to create a warm, inviting atmosphere.

Practical aids, such as a lubricant suitable for massage, are important to have to hand. (An oil is wonderful for a sensual body massage, but for the yoni most oils are somewhat too greasy. The vagina cannot process oil well and cannot expel it either, which creates a risk of irritation. The exception is good quality coconut oil.)

Tips

Our recommendations

2. Relaxation through body massage

The session begins with a body massage to relax body and mind.
The type of massage differs from person to person; one person prefers a somewhat firmer massage to warm up and loosen the muscles, while another has a preference for soft, almost meditative touches that help release thoughts and reach a completely relaxed state of mind. Usually a combination of both is most pleasant, but it is wise to discuss this beforehand, so the massage is perfectly tailored.

Illustratie bij artikel over yoni massage glijmiddel aanbrengen bij De Paarse Keizerin voor tips

3. Applying lubricant

When body and mind are fully relaxed, the yoni massage can begin.

First apply lubricant to the yoni. Then slowly spread the lubricant with your hands. Alternate between your left and right hand.

To begin, place your hand over the vulva, slightly downward, and then slowly move your hand upward, over the clitoris towards the abdomen. Then do the same with your other hand.

4. Massage of the labia

Place one hand on the woman's heart, and one on her yoni. Make contact, wait for her consent, and then begin with a soft, calm massage of the outer and inner labia.

Massage tip: gently take the labium between thumb and index finger and then apply gentle pressure. Continue in this way along the entire length of the labium.

Then centre on the clitoris. Make small, feather-light circles around the clitoris. You can change direction several times.

5. Ask consent before entering the yoni

Continue calmly and unhurriedly with the massage of the clitoris and labia until it is time to enter the yoni. Always ask permission before entering the yoni!

Place a finger on the vagina and let it be drawn inside, as it were, by the yoni. Make small, gentle circles again, this time around the opening of the vagina. Continue with this and gradually focus on the upper side of the vagina.

6. Massaging the G-spot

Let one hand rest on the lower abdomen. Gently bring your index finger and middle finger of the other hand inside.

Please note: your hand should be positioned palm facing upward. Move your finger, circling and lovingly massaging, slowly further inward. Make a "come here" motion with your fingers. This is how you massage the G-spot.

Experiment with the pressure and let your loved one indicate what feels pleasant and what is less comfortable.

7. Including clitoral massage

You can now let your hand descend slightly from the lower abdomen and gently massage the clitoris with it.

8. Spreading and connecting sensations

The sensations evoked by the yoni massage can also be spread throughout the rest of the body. To do this, massage the yoni with your right hand. The way you do so does not matter. With your left hand, massage the abdomen.

You can make small circular or up-and-down movements here, for example.

9. Maintaining contact

Stay in contact with each other and regularly massage the entire body from the yoni, to continue spreading that pleasant feeling throughout the rest of body and mind.

Take your time

A yoni massage is not a 'quickie' and can last up to two hours, but in any case rarely lasts less than half an hour. During preparation, during the massage, and afterwards, it is important to remain calm and attentive and maintain a feeling of warmth and security, so the person being massaged can calmly catch her breath afterwards, and then experience life with renewed energy!

Lovely products to go with it

Good to know

All our recommended products have been carefully tested and compared by our regular test teams - women and men who objectively evaluate every lubricant, every oil, and every book on feel, effect, ease of use, and safety. This way you can be sure that you are choosing quality that real people are enthusiastic about.

Frequently Asked Questions

What exactly is a yoni massage?

A yoni massage is a gentle, loving massage of the vagina (yoni) and the intimate area of a woman. The goal is not to induce orgasm, but to release tension, allow sexual energy to flow, and experience deep relaxation and healing.

Is a yoni massage suitable for every woman?

Yes, every adult woman can benefit from a yoni massage. Age, sexual preference, or experience do not matter. The most important thing is that you feel safe and can surrender to the moment in an atmosphere of trust.

Can I learn to give a yoni massage myself?

Yes, you can learn to give a yoni massage yourself. With the right attention, respect, and practice, it becomes a loving experience. Use a reliable step-by-step guide, instruction book, or DVD as a reference, for example from tantra expert Dirk Liesenfeld.

Which lubricant is best for a yoni massage?

Preferably use a water-based lubricant that is specifically suitable for intimate use. Regular massage oil is often too greasy for the vagina and can cause irritation. An exception is good-quality coconut oil, which is suitable.

How long does a yoni massage last?

A yoni massage usually lasts between half an hour and two hours. It is not something to rush. Take ample time for the preparation, the body massage, the yoni massage itself, and the aftercare, so that the receiving woman can fully come to rest.

Can emotions surface during a yoni massage?

Yes, it is completely normal for unprocessed emotions and past experiences to surface during a yoni massage. The pelvic area can hold tensions and memories. This can be intense, but is generally experienced as healing and liberating.

Where can I find a reliable professional yoni massage therapist?

Research the background of a massage therapist thoroughly. There is no official diploma for this profession. Check whether they are affiliated with a recognised professional organisation such as NIBIG or CAT. Professionals who offer sexual services under the guise of yoni massage are not serious practitioners.

What is the difference between a yoni massage and a lingam massage?

A yoni massage focuses on the female intimate area, while a lingam massage is the male equivalent. The sensitivity of the yoni is considerably higher than that of the lingam, which is why the experience is often much more intense for women.

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